Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Warmly-affectionate: Speaks very tenderly about a partner and small moments, like holding her hands and missing her: “دستای کوچولوشو گرفتم تو دستام و غیب شدن 🥹🫠” and “دلم براش تنگ شده 🫠🥹 منتظرم از مسافرت برگرده بگیرم بچلونمش و بریم چایی بخوریم و حرف بزنیم و قدم بزنیم”.
- Humorous-witty: Uses playful jokes and wordplay, e.g. on C++ spelling: “بهم بگید ملا لغتی ولی عصبی میشم وقتی میبینم جای ++C مینویسن C++” and self-deprecating trading joke: “لانگ باز کردم ولی لانگ لنگای منو باز کرد”.
- Emotionally-selfaware: Open about mental health, war stress, and motivation: “افسردگی و مصرف دارو خب اضافه وزن بدی برام اورد ولی دوباره برمیگردم به اوج 😎” and “عوارض جنگ برای من توی این ۱۲ روز این بود که ۶ کیلو وزن کم کردم و از نظر روانی گاییده شدم”.
- Curious-builder: Enjoys learning and tinkering with tools and tech: “بعد ۳ سال نشستم واسه خودم دارم Next.js میزنم 👀😂”, “با Cursor دارم حال میکنم و نسبت به Copilot بیشتر دوسش داشتم 😁”, and monorepo praise: “درود بر monorepo”.
- Supportive-encouraging: Gives advice and reassurance to others, e.g. about body image: “اگه کسی بهتون گفت چاق بهش توجه نکنید شما بزرگتر از این حرفایید” and focus/time-management tips in a reply: “بازه تمرکزتون رو در بیارید… عوامل حواس پرتی مثل سوشال مدیا رو کمتر نکنید ولی تو یه برنامه مشخص بذارید”.
Weaknesses:
- Harsh-vulgar: Frequently uses strong profanity and coarse expressions, even when venting about politics or events, e.g. “کیر تو اون پیروزیتون که تو سالگردش هم برق میره” and “کون گُ”.
- Cynical-engagement: Often focuses on how bad or toxic replies are, which can reinforce negativity: “but the replies are so cancerous omfg it's so unbelievable” and “Just. Entertain yourself for a few, read the replies.”.
- Stress-overloaded: Mentions being heavily impacted by war, explosions, and mental health, suggesting high stress load: “خایه کردم از حجم صدا و انفجارهای کرج” and “از نظر روانی گاییده شدم”.
- Work-burnoutprone: Jokes about deadlines and being unsure tasks finish on time, hinting at pressure/procrastination: “وقتی ازم میپرسن تسک به موقع میرسه؟” and needing motivation after depression and meds: “از شنبه میسازمت بدن… دوباره برمیگردم به اوج 😎”.
- Academia-averse: Expresses strong dislike for academic environments, which might limit certain opportunities: “بسکه از فضای آکادمیک متنفرم و بدم میومده آشنا منو تو یه دانشگاه دید کرک و پرش ریخت 👀😂” and joking confusion about being called an engineer: “منی که علوم پایه خوندم ولی بهم میگن مهندس چیکار کنم؟ 😂”.
Your Simpsons character
Homer Simpson
They come across as a mix of warmth, impulsiveness, self-deprecating humor, and surprising competence beneath the chaos, which fits Homer Simpson best. Like Homer, they clearly love food and turn everyday meals into mini-events, from proudly documenting cooking adventures like the cheat-meal stew and ghormeh sabzi in tweets such as “از اونجایی که فردا میخوام وعده تقلب (cheat meal) بخورم الان دارم قرمهسبزی رو بار میذارم 😎” and “اینم از نتیجه 😎🤌🏻”. There’s also that classic Homer-style complaining yet pushing through life’s pains and annoyances, like “خب استارت اخر هفته رو با درد شدید سیاتیک بعد از خواب بیدار شدن رو میزنیم” and the dark-humor venting about war and stress in “عوارض جنگ برای من توی این ۱۲ روز این بود که ۶ کیلو وزن کم کردم و از نظر روانی گاییده شدم”. Underneath the jokes and swearing, there’s deep softness and attachment to loved ones—very Homer-with-his-family energy—seen in affectionate posts about a partner like “شرایط سختیه ولی راضیم این دختر رو دارم و هیچی دیگه نمیخوام” and “دلم براش تنگ شده 🫠🥹 منتظرم از مسافرت برگرده بگیرم بچلونمش و بریم چایی بخوریم و حرف بزنیم و قدم بزنیم”. The mix of goofy bravado, technical competence (e.g., coding and dev tools in “بعد ۳ سال نشستم واسه خودم دارم Next.js میزنم 👀😂” and “درود بر monorepo”), and emotional oversharing mirrors Homer’s pattern of messing up, caring deeply, and somehow making things work in the end.
Your MBTI personality Type
ISFP
They lean Introvert over Extrovert: their tweets focus on a small circle (partner, mom, a few friends), private experiences and internal reactions, like missing their partner and wanting quiet moments together (“منتظرم از مسافرت برگرده بگیرم بچلونمش و بریم چایی بخوریم و حرف بزنیم و قدم بزنیم”), rather than large social scenes or attention‑seeking. Their style points to Sensing: they linger on sensory, concrete details—food, perfume, body pain, travel—such as describing cooking and eating ghormeh sabzi (“از دیشب تا ظهر واسه ناهار یه چیزی بشه که 🤌🏻😌”) or recommending a specific hot sauce (“سس چیلی تای سبز دلوسه رو پیشنهاد میکنم 🔥”). The emotional tone is strong, affectionate and relationship‑driven, suggesting Feeling: they talk about war trauma and missing someone (“۱۲ روز این دختر رو ندیدم و دلم براش تنگ شده 🥲”) and how their life gains color through a relationship and guitar (“زندگیم از اون بی رنگی داره در میاد ♥️ گیتارمم هست تازه 🥹”). On the T/F boundary they can be blunt and sarcastic, but even sarcasm is usually value‑laden or protective, such as criticizing disrespectful people or bad technicians (“تو ایران هیچ وقت یه تعمیرکار فنی درست حسابی که واقعا کارشو بلد باشه و بفهمه ندیدم”). Finally, they seem more Perceiving than Judging: they joke about money and ad‑hoc goals (“تقریبا یه چیزی حدود ۱۰ میلیون دلار نیاز دارم”) and narrate life as it unfolds—spontaneous theater trips, cooking experiments, and starting diet/gym with a casual tone (“از شنبه میسازمت بدن 🙂↔️ … دوباره برمیگردم به اوج 😎”) rather than rigid plans. Overall, the blend of introverted, sensory, emotionally expressive and flexible behavior is most consistent with ISFP: a practical, feeling‑driven, aesthetic‑minded type who processes life through concrete experiences and close relationships.
Some pickup lines for you
- You said you get annoyed when people write C++ instead of ++C — if we ever pair program, I promise to get the syntax right… as long as you let me increment your happiness one coffee at a time.
- You survived explosions in Karaj, sciatic pain, dieting, and still found the energy to go back to the gym and pick up guitar — I’m just saying, if your ‘hard mode’ looks like this, imagine how good we’d be together on ‘co‑op.’
- You cooked ghormeh sabzi for a cheat meal, perfected fish in the air fryer, and still found time to review perfumes like Tom Ford Oud Wood — I don’t need a cheat day, I just need a dinner date at your place and I’m set for the week.
- You wrote about holding her tiny hands until they disappeared in yours and how life got more colorful with her around; anyone who loves that deeply is exactly the kind of person I’d like to walk with, drink tea with, and maybe write our own little anecdote with.
- You vibe with Chris Rea, Eagles, George Michael, Antimatter, and you’re hyped for game trailers — if we share a cab from Tehran to Karaj someday, I’m bringing the playlist; you just bring that smile you get when a notification from someone special pops up.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Dev who rants in Farsi, lifts to fix his brain, slow-roasts ghormeh sabzi & shreds beginner guitar solos. Once lost 6kg and still missed his cat.– @shywn_mrk
Your signature cocktail
The Long Langa Highball
Named after their self‑roast on trading — “لانگ باز کردم ولی لانگ لنگای منو باز کرد” — The Long Langa Highball is strong, a bit chaotic, but ultimately uplifting. The espresso shot salutes their bio’s “Coffee enthusiast ☕” and powers the same late-night energy that leads to posts like “بعد ۳ سال نشستم واسه خودم دارم Next.js میزنم 👀😂”. A smoky whisky layer reflects the darker, war‑time and mental‑health notes in “عوارض جنگ برای من توی این ۱۲ روز این بود که ۶ کیلو وزن کم کردم و از نظر روانی گاییده شدم…”, giving depth under the humour. Pomegranate molasses adds a bittersweet, Persian sweetness that fits tweets like “چیزی که الان و در کل از زندگی میخوام و یه پیشی کم دارم 🥹” and all the tender posts about “این دختر” and holding her tiny hands “دستای کوچولوشو گرفتم تو دستام و غیب شدن 🥹🫠”. Topped with sparkling water and lime-twisted crushed ice, it keeps things playful and refreshing, echoing their humour in lines like “بهم بگید ملا لغتی ولی عصبی میشم وقتی میبینم جای ++C مینویسن C++” and their proud food experiments from ghormeh sabzi to air‑fryer feasts “از اونجایی که فردا میخوام وعده تقلب (cheat meal) بخورم الان دارم قرمهسبزی رو بار میذارم 😎”. This is a cocktail that starts serious, ends fizzy, and stays just a little bit nerdy throughout.
Your Hogwarts House
Hufflepuff
Shayan consistently shows strong Hufflepuff traits: loyalty, care, and quiet steadiness in relationships. He’s openly affectionate and emotionally invested in loved ones, writing about missing someone during war and psychological strain in “عوارض جنگ برای من توی این ۱۲ روز این بود که ۶ کیلو وزن کم کردم و از نظر روانی گاییده شدم و ۱۲ روز این دختر رو ندیدم و دلم براش تنگ شده 🥲” and expressing deep warmth in “شرایط سختیه ولی راضیم این دختر رو دارم و هیچی دیگه نمیخوام همه چی با وجودش راحتتره انگیزم بیشتر شده و زندگیم از اون بی رنگی داره در میاد ♥️ گیتارمم هست تازه 🥹”. His patience and diligence come through in self-improvement arcs: returning to diet and gym after depression in “خب خب خب از شنبه میسازمت بدن 🙂↔️ بعد از یک سال و نیم دوری دوباره میریم تو کار رژیم و باشگاه…” and grinding through painful guitar practice in “سوزش انگشت دارم ولی کم کم اولین تمرین داره صدای تمیز ازش در میاد 😁 یه نت میخوام بزنم ۴ تا صدا مختلف دیگه هم در میارم 😂”. He also shows a down‑to‑earth, kind focus on others’ wellbeing and encouragement, as in the body‑image reassurance of “اگه کسی بهتون گفت چاق بهش توجه نکنید شما بزرگتر از این حرفایید” and structured advice about dealing with attention and social media in “اینکه قطعا یه مشکلی هست تو زندگیتون که باید برید دنبالش برطرف کنید… عوامل حواس پرتی مثل سوشال مدیا رو کمتر نکنید ولی تو یه برنامه مشخص بذارید یا بعد از انجام کاراتون”. While he has wit and a techie’s analytical side, the dominant pattern is reliability, care, and a preference for meaningful, steady connections over drama, which aligns most strongly with Hufflepuff.
Your movie
Your song
Fix You - Coldplay
A fitting song for Shayan is Fix You by Coldplay, because its mix of vulnerability, perseverance, and quiet hope mirrors the tone of many of their tweets. They’re open about stress, war, and mental health, like when they wrote about the effects of war and weight loss and being psychologically wrecked: “عوارض جنگ برای من توی این ۱۲ روز این بود که ۶ کیلو وزن کم کردم و از نظر روانی گاییده شدم” and about depression, meds, and getting back to the gym: “افسرگی و مصرف دارو خب اضافه وزن بدی برام اورد ولی دوباره برمیگردم به اوج 😎”. At the same time, they hold on to small joys—coffee, cooking, and humor—as if they’re little lights in the dark: “واسه ناهار یه ماهی پختم که 🤌🏻 بهترین چیزی بود که تا الان تو ایرفرایر درست کردم” and “تو ایرفرایر سوسیسو ناگت بذارید خوب میشه 😌”. The song’s theme of love as emotional support also resonates with how they write about their partner, whose presence clearly keeps them going: “شرایط سختیه ولی راضیم این دختر رو دارم و هیچی دیگه نمیخوام… زندگیم از اون بی رنگی داره در میاد ♥️” and “هر چقدر میره جلوتر هرچقدر بیشتر صحبت میکنیم قشنگتر میشه و جالبه دقیقا همینجوری که دوست داریم هم میشه 🥹🫠”. Even their small motivational notes to others about focus and reducing distractions—“بازه تمرکزتون رو در بیارید… به مرور زیادتر میشه”—echo the song’s message of slowly rebuilding when things fall apart. Overall, Fix You captures that blend of pain, dark humor, tenderness, and the determination to keep moving that runs through their timeline.
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