
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Like Jeff Albertson, @SqirrelC is a cynical, terminally online gatekeeper who frequently expresses disdain for anything he deems “pathetic” or “normie”. Both share a deep obsession with niche pop culture, ranging from tactical shooters and anime girls to complaining that “The world you grew up in no longer exists” due to changing media trends. His feed is a parade of Worst. Episode. Ever. energy, characterized by constant “noticing” of political grievances and elitist gatekeeping of hobbies. Ultimately, his blend of antisocial edge, digital hoarding of “foid” imagery, and constant mockery of others' “little brains” mirrors the quintessential Springfield shut-in.

Your MBTI personality Type
Alfonzo exhibits strong Introversion (I) through his focus on solitary digital hobbies like gaming and anime, specifically noting his “50 different laugh sounds” and a preference for niche online subcultures over real-world social interaction. His Intuition (N) is visible in his frequent use of abstract, irony-poisoned internet terminology and political theorizing, such as his comments on “globohomo brown race communism”. He leans heavily toward Thinking (T) with a blunt, confrontational, and often edgy communication style, dismissively calling others “retards” or “normies” while valuing logic over social harmony. Finally, his Perceiving (P) nature is shown through his spontaneous, stream-of-consciousness tweeting and a lack of structured routine, evidenced by his observation that “twitter for whatever reason stopped showing me oomf posts for a while” without much concern for order.

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Your new Twitter bio
Czech-based tech enthusiast and video editor. When I’m not perfecting my latest cut or cheering for FaZe Clan, I’m probably debating the merits of AI in Zlín.– @SqirrelC

Your signature cocktail
This drink starts with a base of “Božkov rum”, a nod to his Czech roots, topped with beer because he “loves beer🍻”. The pitch-black color represents his “love for cats🖤”, while the single frozen grape pays homage to his “FREE FROZEN FROM FAZE CLAN” tweet. It’s a bitter, experimental concoction designed for someone who feels “born to slay disgusting beasts” and wants to avoid being a “normie❤️”. The strong alcohol content reflects a mood that frequently suggests to “annihilate everything that exists”.

Your Hogwarts House
Alfonzo exhibits a clear Slytherin preoccupation with 'blood' status and 'in-groups,' frequently using derogatory terms to differentiate himself from those he deems inferior, as seen in his tweet, “Genuinely, how do even woman tolerate these fags in their spaces”. His worldview is defined by a hardline 'us vs. them' mentality and a disdain for perceived weakness, exemplified by his claim that “These people are really just weak” when discussing those who back down from political confrontation. He shows an ambitious, edge-lord persona that values shock value and power, even stating that “As if it being tied to fascism was a bad thing”. Ultimately, his focus on heritage, rigid social hierarchies, and a self-serving 'noticing' of specific identities aligns him with the darker traits of the House of Black and Silver.

Your movie

Your song
This song has become an anthem for online subcultures that romanticize the past while expressing deep cynicism toward the modern world, perfectly matching @SqirrelC's frequent laments that “The world you grew up in no longer exists”. The lyrics' themes of isolation and shifting realities resonate with their view that “Romance is dead” and their aggressive stance against what they call “globohomo brown race communism”. The song’s dark, synth-heavy atmosphere mirrors their nihilistic outbursts, such as when they post to “Annihilate everything that exists” because the world is cruel. Ultimately, Little Dark Age captures the user's specific blend of political fringe views, ironic detachment, and a longing for an idealized, “aristocratic” aesthetic.

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SqirrelC
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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