
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
The user’s constant references to drinking, reckless behavior, bragging about being "cool" on surveillance footage, and a generally clueless, self‑centered attitude align with Homer Simpson’s well‑known love of beer, laziness and tendency to cause trouble without understanding the consequences. For example, they say "I love alcohol but I’d NEVER EVER be an alcoholic" which mirrors Homer’s denial of his drinking problem. Their tweet "I’m like a moth, if you blind me with your Highbeams I’m ramming into you" shows the same clueless, reckless energy that Homer displays when he drives or runs into things. Their brag about "Man, I look cool as fuck on CCTV footage" and "Doing surveillance has become so lucrative for me it’s starting to feel illegal" echo Homer’s occasional self‑congratulatory, naive view of his own misdeeds. The frequent hateful and violent statements also fit Homer's occasional bigoted outbursts and lack of empathy, making Homer the closest match among the main characters.

Your MBTI personality Type
Extroverted: The user constantly broadcasts personal experiences and seeks attention, e.g., 'Man, I look cool as fuck on CCTV footage' and 'Doing surveillance has become so lucrative for me it’s starting to feel illegal'. Sensing: They focus on concrete, immediate details such as 'Found some guy from Benin’s passport w/ his student visa. Put it back where I found it' and 'I keep a BB gun in my basement to shoot big crickets and spiders'. Thinking: Their statements are framed in logical, albeit harsh, analyses like 'People don’t realize, organizations like the SRA and John Brown Gun Club have been training ANTIFA members for almost 10 years' and 'If you’re mentally unfit to stand trial they need to just shoot you outside the courthouse'. Perceiving: Their behavior is impulsive and unstructured, shown by spontaneous remarks like 'I’m like a moth, if you blind me with your Highbeams I’m ramming into you' and 'I’m out of the hospital … Time to lock in on CS2'. This pattern aligns with the ESTP type.

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Your new Twitter bio
Collector of Goodwill treasure—found a Patagonia jacket for $100. Gaming, road trips, and old tales.– @SuburbanEthos

Your signature cocktail
The Suburban Stalker is a dark, high‑octane mix that mirrors @SuburbanEthos’s love of surveillance, guns and chaos. A base of bourbon captures the "I keep a BB gun in my basement to shoot big crickets and spiders" vibe, while Kahlua reflects the "Doing surveillance has become so lucrative for me it’s starting to feel illegal" mindset. A splash of Red Bull adds the jittery "Update: drunk as a skunk" energy, and a dash of Tabasco gives the bite of hateful posts like "Women who like a full head of hair are pedophiles". A tiny plastic camera garnish nods to the constant "Surveillance quick tip: to avoid being silouted through your tint, buy some vehicle curtains off amazon" advice. This drink is as unsettling and volatile as the timeline of tweets, embodying the chaotic, confrontational personality of SuburbanEthos.

Your Hogwarts House
The user frequently shows a desire for personal gain and a willingness to bend or break rules for advantage, which aligns with Slytherin’s ambition and cunning. For example, they write, "Doing surveillance has become so lucrative for me it’s starting to feel illegal" and "Nothing feels more illegal than driving w/ a trunk full of guns you legally own across multiple states," indicating a resourceful, rule‑bending mindset. They also express a harsh, utilitarian view of others, such as "If you’re mentally unfit to stand trial they need to just shoot you outside the courthouse," showing a lack of empathy typical of Slytherin’s self‑preservation. The overall pattern of self‑promotion, strategic manipulation, and disregard for moral constraints points to Slytherin.

Your movie

Your song
The song "Every Breath You Take" by The Police perfectly captures SuburbanEthos’s obsession with watching and being watched. Their bio even calls them a "gang stalking enthusiast", and they repeatedly post surveillance tips, e.g., "Surveillance quick tip: to avoid being silotted through your tint, buy some vehicle curtains off amazon" and "Doing surveillance has become so lucrative for me it’s starting to feel illegal". The lyric "Every breath you take, every move you make, I’ll be watching you" mirrors their constant need to monitor others and their bragging about collecting information. Additionally, the song’s dark, almost creep‑like tone matches their unsettling content about guns, violence and paranoia.

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SuburbanEthos
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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