Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Emotionally expressive: Openly shares feelings of longing, love, and hurt, like in “I need someone to need me” and “I want to be loved by someone as much as I love them.”
- Reflective thinker: Shows nuanced thinking about morally complex characters, e.g. “Andre kriegman... horrid person but was still a person” and questioning fandom takes in this tweet.
- Creative fan: Invests deeply in media with playlists, themed diets, and gimmicks, like the “46 hour andre kriegman playlist” and repeated requests for gimmicks/strawpage.
- Affectionate friend: Shows strong attachment and care for friends and oomfs, e.g. “I miss favoomf”, “I love oomf”, and worrying about Vinny being offline in this tweet.
- Persistent student: Keeps engaging with school and extracurriculars despite stress, like juggling college assignments in this tweet and auditions after an hour of sleep in “have auditions until 7 today”.
Weaknesses:
- Self-destructive: Frequently references wanting to harm or kill themself under stress, such as “im gonna kms” and “next time I have a stupid mood swing Im actually going to end it”.
- Disordered eating: Openly engages in and strategizes restrictive behaviors, like OMAD and fasting in “ive been so locked in omad ing all week” and the detailed fasting plan in this tweet.
- Attention-starved: Strong need to be wanted and noticed, expressed in “who wants me 😛😛😛”, “I want to be wanted”, and “I always feel like a dog begging for attention”.
- Conflict-avoidant: Avoids direct confrontation even when it would help, like delaying coming out to supportive parents in “i hate confrontation so much that i've avoided coming out… for a year now” and fearing counselor involvement in this tweet.
- Identity-unstable: Struggles with name and self-concept, as seen in “no idea what name I go by anymore this shit is tough” and repeated name-searching like “How to find a name that fits”.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
They most closely resemble Lisa Simpson, especially in their combination of intensity, self-awareness, and constant yearning to be understood. Like Lisa, they’re academically aware but overwhelmed, as seen in “i think i'm failing most of my classes and one of my teachers has seemed worried about me recently istg if some counselor shit happens i will kms”, which mirrors Lisa’s anxiety about school and adults intervening. Their obsessive hyperfixations and niche media interests — for example “when the hyperfixation gets so bad I'm learning a whole language” and “I love red dead redemption 2 !!!!” — echo Lisa’s tendency to dive deeply into passions like jazz, politics, or animal rights. Emotionally, they oscillate between wanting love and feeling alienated, shown in “I want to be wanted” and “I hate not being able to tell people what I want because I sit here like some useless fuck just waiting for someone to catch on”, which aligns with Lisa’s chronic loneliness despite being surrounded by people. Even their strong identification with complex, morally messy characters like Andre Kriegman and Jason Dean, such as “seeing zero day tumblr users identify with andre but in the he's the number one most evil creature ever way and not the mentally disturbed teenage boy who was a horrid person but was still a person way”, reflects Lisa’s habit of empathizing with flawed figures and overanalyzing media through an emotional and intellectual lens.
Your MBTI personality Type
INFP
They lean Introvert (I) over Extrovert given how much they center inner feelings, online parasocial/yearning and a small circle, e.g. “I get attached to someone and then i'll be ruined for months if not years to come” and “I hate not being able to tell people what I want because I sit here like some useless fuck just waiting for someone to catch on”, plus joking about wanting to be a “loser freak” alone at home in “i need this person to get out of my house so i can go back to being a loser freak”. Their hyperfixations, symbolism-heavy media tastes (Zero Day, Hannibal, The Black Phone, RDR2) and abstract identity talk point strongly to Intuition (N): they relate to morally complex, conceptual characters like in “seeing zero day tumblr users identify with andre but in the he's the number one most evil creature ever way and not the mentally disturbed teenage boy who was a horrid person but was still a person way” and project onto them in “The way I relate to both Will snd Hannibal so much is sickening to me”. They clearly prefer Feeling (F) over Thinking: decisions and reactions are emotion-driven, with intense yearning and sensitivity, e.g. “I want to be wanted”, “I want to be loved by someone as much as I love them.”, and catastrophizing moods in “Next time I have a stupid mood swing Im actually going to end it”. Their lifestyle reads more Perceiving (P) than Judging: they procrastinate and improvise around school and life obligations, such as “I have a college class assignment due and it locks tonight at 11:59 pm do we think i can lock in?”, plus chaotic shifting plans and gimmicks like fasting strategies in “fasting tomorrow bc I have auditions afterschool so I can bring a packed dinner but tell people there that I'll be having dinner at home but tell my mom that I ate the packed dinner”. Taken together—intensely inward emotion, idealized love, fixation on fictional morality and identity, and disorganized, spur-of-the-moment behavior—INFP is the best-fitting MBTI match.
Some pickup lines for you
- You keep talking about wanting a zero day or Andre Kriegman themed diet, but I’m trying to be the one thing you don’t starve yourself of.
- You said you feel like a housewife waiting for her husband to come back from war when Vinny isn’t online — if I enlist as your favorite boy, will you wait for me like that or just spam me Hannibal screenshots?
- You’ve got a 46-hour Andre Kriegman playlist, a RDR2 obsession, and shedtwt brainrot… statistically speaking, shouldn’t you be hyperfixated on me by now too?
- You said, “I need someone to need me” and “I yearn for a boy to love and call mine” — consider this my formal application to be the stupid kissboy who actually shows up.
- You fast through the day, memorize Zero Day, cry over theatre auditions, and still worry about your gimmicks… if loving a mentally ill, RDR2-obsessed, Hannibal-core yearner is wrong, I don’t wanna be Cal-correct.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Andrew, 15 | theatre kid, RDR2 enjoyer & horror media analyst | once missed my bus stop reading Percy Jackson, still think it was worth it– @taintedpassionn
Your signature cocktail
The Yearning Zerodayner
The Yearning Zerodayner is a sharp, restless mix that hits like staying up all night doomscrolling and overthinking auditions. Blackberry vodka stands in for their dark romantic fixations and horror boy crushes like “the ungodly things i'd let Jason Dean do to me” and “Stu and Billy could do unimaginable things to me”. Cold brew coffee captures constant exhaustion and academic stress from “im so tired all the time” and “I have a college class assignment due and it locks tonight at 11:59 pm do we think i can lock in?”. Pomegranate syrup is the sweet, dramatic heart of a boy who admits “I want to be wanted” and “i yearn for a boy to love and call mine”. A dash of sea salt tincture reflects the sting of self-destructive humor and ED talk like “I was on shedtwt when i was 10 11 😭😭😭 apparently i just cant fucking recover 🥀🥀🥀” and “last time i went to the doctor i was bmi 17 😛😛😛”. It’s all topped with fizzy tonic and lime for that chaotic, online, gimmick-loving energy from “send me gimmicks” and their proudly dramatic intro “heノit ⠀𖦏ㅤ ednos ︵ mlm, single, the yearner .ᐟ”.
Your Hogwarts House
Hufflepuff
They show an intense longing for connection, affection, and mutual care, which aligns strongly with Hufflepuff’s core of loyalty and attachment to others. Repeated tweets like “I want to be loved by someone as much as I love them.”, “I want to be wanted”, and “who wants to be stupid kissboys with me?” show their primary drive is relational rather than power, status, or intellect. They fixate deeply on specific people (fav oomfs, Vinny, crushes) and stay emotionally attached for a long time, as in “i get attached to someone and then i'll be ruined for months if not years to come” and “I do miss him”, which is very Hufflepuff-coded devotion. Even when talking about school and teachers, the main concern is emotional fallout and relationships, not achievement or rivalry, as in “i think i'm failing most of my classes and one of my teachers has seemed worried about me recently istg if some counselor shit happens i will kms”. While they have darker interests and lots of yearning, there’s little evidence of calculated ambition or intellectual pride; instead, their whole persona is "the yearner"—a sensitive, attachment-driven kid—which fits Hufflepuff far better than the other houses.
Your movie
Your song
I Wanna Be Yours - Arctic Monkeys
The song I Wanna Be Yours fits them because so much of their online presence is about intense, almost obsessive yearning to be needed and loved, like when they say “i need someone to need me” and “i yearn for a boy to love and call mine”. The lyrics’ fixation on devotion and wanting to belong to someone mirrors their self-description as “the yearner” in their intro post “andrew, fifteen ... mlm, single, the yearner”. Their repeated “I want to be wanted” themes, like “I want to be wanted” and “who wants me 😛😛😛”, echo the song’s desire to be chosen completely by another person. Even their long-term attachments, such as “I get attached to someone and then i'll be ruined for months if not years to come”, resonate with the song’s almost desperate, all-or-nothing romantic intensity. Overall, the dreamy but aching romanticism of I Wanna Be Yours captures both their vulnerability and their craving for deep, consuming connection.
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