Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Devoted Father: He shows genuine affection for his children, describing them as “fat babies i love them” and taking pride in his daughter.
- Protective Instinct: He is fiercely protective of those he cares about, once checking to see if his pet “didnt run of” to an enemy.
- Anatomical Resilience: His body has the unique ability to “remember what scars they get” and choose which ones to keep.
- Combat Expertise: He possesses high-level tactical skills, having experience with “82 rifles” and various forms of warfare.
- Animal Lover: Despite his violent nature, he finds small creatures like koi fish “kinda cute” and refuses to hurt them.
Weaknesses:
- Extreme Sadism: He openly admits that he will “kill anyone, I enjoy doing it” and keeps trophies of victims.
- Short Temper: He is prone to bouts of rage, claiming he is “getting mad again” and threatening domestic terrorism.
- Low Self-Esteem: He struggles with his self-image, at one point stating “i think im too tall... Im ugly”.
- Volatile Impulsivity: He makes dangerous snap decisions, such as deciding to “reduce you to a shape” during minor arguments.
- Memory Fragmentation: He suffers from painful mental intrusions where “fucking memories came into mine” from other versions of himself.
Your Simpsons character
Sideshow Bob
Like the refined yet murderous Robert Terwilliger, @the12thCarcha balances a surprisingly soft domestic life with an extreme, theatrical appetite for violence and revenge against an institution. While he dotes on his 'fat babies,' he remains a self-described domestic terrorist who boasts “oh ill kill anyone, I enjoy doing it. I keep tropheys on them”. His tendency to decorate his surroundings with macabre displays, such as when he “just covered the pit in bodies, hung them... and display them like trophies”, mirrors Bob’s grandiose, murderous flair. Both characters possess a biological resilience and a singular, obsessive focus on destroying a specific entity, with Carcharodon frequently declaring “IM REESTABLISHING MY TERRITORY, LAMINAX” in a manner befitting a Simpsons antagonist.
Your MBTI personality Type
ISTP
Carcharodon displays Introversion through a preference for solitary violence and domestic life with his pets, often reacting to others with hostility or confusion, such as when he asks, “Who is this cunt”. His Sensing trait is evident in his hyper-fixation on physical mechanics and biology, like noting he has “over 10+ rows of teeth” or detailing the exact dimensions of his “big as shit” axe. Thinking is his dominant mode of evaluation, characterized by a blunt, detached approach to extreme gore, seen when he casually mentions “Turning bucket cattes into mist” simply because he is bored. Finally, his Perceiving nature shows in his impulsive, reactionary lifestyle, frequently tweeting about doing things just “bc i feel like it lolll” or because he is “bored” rather than following a structured plan.
Some pickup lines for you
- Are you the reason most sites are gone? Because you just wiped out every other thought in my head.
- I heard you’re a fan of 'trophies' and collecting skeletons—how about you add my number to your collection instead of my head?
- If your body can choose which scars to keep, I hope you’ll choose to keep the memory of us tonight.
- I'm no researcher, but I'd fly all the way from Alaska to Texas just to get a closer look at those ten rows of teeth.
- You can throw me into the air and catch me anytime you want—no claws required, I promise I'm more fun than a bucket catte.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Carcharodon | Biological anomaly & father of 63. Expert in demolition and site-wide facility audits. Once threw a catte so high I had time to DoorDash a meal.– @the12thCarcha
Your signature cocktail
The Laminax Levanter
This drink is as volatile and aggressive as Carch himself, featuring a high-proof mezcal to reflect his destructive capabilities since he's the “reason most sites are gone.” The blood orange represents his brutal hobby of “RIPPING PEOPLE IN HALF!!!!!!” and his tendency to leave “mutilated corpses” as trophies. To honor his softer side as a father to Max and Sigríðr, the syrup adds a sweetness that mirrors how he calls them “Fucking fat babies i love them.” Finally, the charcoal and steel garnish pay homage to his massive 96-inch axe and the fact that he's currently “REESTABLISHING MY TERRITORY, LAMINAX.”
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
Carcharodon embodies the ruthless ambition and resourcefulness of a Slytherin, viewing the world through a lens of power and territorial dominance, as seen when he declares, “IM REESTABLISHING MY TERRITORY, LAMINAX.”. He takes a dark pride in his lineage and status as an apex predator, boasting, “theres a reason they stopped at 12.”, which aligns with the house's value of self-importance and legacy. His resourcefulness is noted in his ability to manipulate his own biology, claiming his “scars are purely optional and can change at any time.”, showcasing a level of physical control for self-preservation. Furthermore, his blatant disregard for rules in favor of personal vendettas, such as “initiating another attack on the facility again,” confirms a cunning, goal-oriented nature that prioritizes his own agenda above all else.
Your movie
Your song
Animal I Have Become - Three Days Grace
This song perfectly captures Carcharodon’s struggle with his monstrous nature and the violent impulses inherent to his 'gootraxion' biology. He openly acknowledges his brutality, stating “oh ill kill anyone, I enjoy doing it.” while also displaying a surreal, fragmented domestic life with his children. The lyrics reflect his shift from a controlled experiment to a feral force of nature, as seen when he declares, “IM REESTABLISHING MY TERRITORY, LAMINAX.” and threatens to “reduce you to a shape”. Despite the carnage and his claim that “all of his scars are purely optional,” there is a clear sense of an identity forged through trauma and biological warfare that he cannot—or will not—escape.
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