TheEbonyMaw
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
The user’s self‑aggrandizing bio – “Your Tweets Are Inconsequential Compared to Mine.” – mirrors Homer’s ego‑centric confidence. Their chaotic parenting story – “Boys asked to play ‘throw on the bed’, so they took turns having me toss them on our bed… 5yr old son landed wrong and got hurt” – reflects Homer’s slap‑dash, clueless approach to raising his kids. The blunt, crude political rant – “The people who get upset at needing to ‘earn a living’ don’t realize that the only other real solutions are either 100% self‑sustainability, or slave labor…” – fits Homer’s crude humor and simplistic worldview. The habit of posting repetitive “Good morning.” pictures is reminiscent of Homer’s daily “Mmm…” catch‑phrase. Overall, the blend of a bumbling dad, self‑importance, and sarcastic, off‑hand commentary best matches Homer Simpson.

Your MBTI personality Type
The EbonyMaw frequently engages the public, posting multiple daily updates like the recurring "Good morning." tweets and sharing commentary on current events, indicating an extraverted communication style. Their posts are rich in concrete, sensory detail—e.g., the vivid parenting story about a 3‑year‑old finding a "hamster" on the driveway—showing a dominant Sensing preference. They consistently frame opinions with logical analysis, such as calling the European anti‑nuclear sentiment "beyond the pale" and critiquing the "earn a living" mindset, reflecting a Thinking decision‑making approach. Their routine‑oriented content, from structured bedtime negotiations ("Okay [3yr old], you’ve been getting in our bed every night…") to regular "Good morning" posts, reveals a Judging preference for order and planning. Overall, the combination of extraversion, sensing, thinking, and judging aligns best with the ESTJ personality type.

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Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Dad of three, gamer & meme curator. I once pretended a hamster was a bedtime story. Sharing parenting chaos, gaming rants & occasional takes.– @TheEbonyMaw

Your signature cocktail
The Maw's True Ending Espresso Old Fashioned is a dark, layered cocktail that mirrors @TheEbonyMaw’s mix of sharp sarcasm, meme‑savvy humor, and relentless parenting stories. A shot of espresso and a splash of bourbon give the drink a bold, caffeinated bite, echoing the tweet "What a funny meme to see right after beating Persona 4 Golden & getting the True Ending. Can’t be a coincidence." The addition of whole milk represents the endless anecdotes about his kids, such as "Playing outside with the kids. 3yr old goes into the middle of the driveway, pretends scoops something up & says, “Look! I found a hamster!”" and "Putting the kids to bed…". A dash of Angostura bitters adds a bitter edge that reflects his cynical takes like "I don’t get it. Asking about one’s job is an easy starter because almost everyone has one, it’s never really considered a creepy question, and it can reveal things about who you are…" while simple syrup smooths the bitterness, nodding to his self‑deprecating moment "This is one of my best tweets. It’s possible that I haven’t made a tweet better than this." Together the flavors create a drink that’s both bitter and sweet, just like his timeline that swings between "Good morning." and controversial commentary, making each sip feel like a true ending to a chaotic day.

Your Hogwarts House
The EbonyMaw’s bio declares "Your Tweets Are Inconsequential Compared to Mine," showing a self‑aggrandizing attitude typical of Slytherin ambition. They frequently assert influence, as in the tweet "Sizable Democrat influencer," and claim they could run a country better than its politicians, e.g., "Anybody could run the UK better than UK politicians." Their confidence in their own statements is evident in "This tweet is one of my best tweets," reflecting a desire for recognition and power. Additionally, their cynical view of societal structures, like "The people who get upset at needing to ‘earn a living’ don’t realize…" reveals a pragmatic, resource‑focused mindset characteristic of Slytherins.

Your movie

Your song
The EbonyMaw's bio claims his tweets eclipse everyone else's, and his posts repeatedly brag about being the best, e.g., "Your Tweets Are Inconsequential Compared to Mine" and "This is one of my best tweets." He also constantly asserts doing things on his own terms, such as "I don't get it. Asking about one's job is an easy starter because almost everyone has one" and "The secret to maintaining your masculinity while your woman carries you is to still be the big spoon." This defiant, self-directed attitude mirrors the core message of Frank Sinatra's classic "My Way," whose chorus declares "I did it my way." Moreover, the song's reflective tone fits his occasional introspection about aging – "In 2025, the number of gray hairs in my beard went from one strand to almost a dozen" – while still celebrating his unapologetic swagger.

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