
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Their chaotic, funny, and slightly feral energy fits Bart Simpson best. They constantly joke about being exhausted or miserable while still clowning around, like “i threw pickles at my friends at lunch and then they all pelted me with tomatos and pickles” and “drinking the shit that made porsche convertible”. There’s a rebellious streak and messy family vibes in posts like “fucking hate my mom bro”, which echoes Bart’s frequent clashes with authority. At the same time, they show genuine attachment and emotional softness with tweets like “i miss my friends” and “i miss my moirail☹️”, similar to how Bart secretly cares a lot. Their obsession with niche interests and media, such as “WARNING MAY RANDOMLY START TALKING ABOUT ALEPH NULL”, also matches Bart’s hyperfixations and intense, slightly chaotic enthusiasm.

Your MBTI personality Type
They read as predominantly introverted: much of their life seems to revolve around online fandoms, daydreaming, and solitary comfort activities rather than in‑person socializing, e.g. “for valentines day i will stay in my room the entire day and daydream about aleph null” and frequent mentions of feeling tired or withdrawn like “today i feel tired. I want to rest but i dont feel like it”. Their interests and language are strongly intuitive: they obsess over fictional universes, OCs, and abstract concepts (Aleph Null, Project Moon, Homestuck, Severance), e.g. “i keep thinking about a Nothing There inspired homestuck OC i just dont have the drawing ability” and “IM SO TIRED ALL IM THINKING ABOUT IS ALEPH NULL BOY LOVE”, which shows preference for ideas and imagination over concrete, practical topics. They lean feeling: their posts are dominated by emotions—misery, affection, missing friends, frustration with their mom—rather than detached logic, e.g. “i miss my friends”, “fuck my life bro”, and “i love hiveswap and aleph null”. Finally, they seem perceiving rather than structured: they constantly talk about being exhausted, procrastinating sleep (“JUST ONE MORE GAMEI NEED TO SLEEP”) and feeling disorganized about school and evaluations (“I KNOW SHE DID NOT JUST LOSE THE PAPER FOR ME TO GET EVALUATED”), and their tweeting style is impulsive, stream‑of‑consciousness, and unplanned. Altogether, this mix of inward focus, imaginative fandom fixation, emotional expressiveness, and spontaneity fits best with INFP.

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Your new Twitter bio
Homestuck & Aleph Null enjoyer powered by Dr Pepper and no sleep. Once slept through my bus stop and called it ‘method acting’ for exhaustion.– @theguzieeb

Your signature cocktail
This drink hits like a sudden hyperfixation: a sharp espresso shot for their constant tiredness and late-night obsession, echoing “IM SO TIRED ALL IM THINKING ABOUT IS ALEPH NULL BOY LOVE” and “IM NEEED TO SLEEP”. A sticky-sweet Dr Pepper reduction syrup stands in for their fizzy enthusiasm and burpy oversharing, straight from “burps ouugh i love dr peper”. The tamarind or calamansi soda adds a bright, slightly sour chaos, matching their dramatic swings between misery and excitement like “my stooomach☹️” and “MY MOM IS GETTING ME CHICKEN TENDERS”. A charcoal-black salt rim nods to their love of grim, weird fandoms (Aleph Null, Outlast, Project Moon) in tweets like “outlast lore is so awesome” and “I LOVE PROJECRT MOON”. Finally, a fluffy whipped cream cloud with red and orange sprinkles represents their trollsonas and dramatic capslock reactions, from “HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO PILOT🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤” to the warning label of “WARNING MAY RANDOMLY START TALKING ABOUT ALEPH NULL”. This cocktail is sweet, jittery, a little burnt-out, and deeply online—just like @theguzieeb.

Your Hogwarts House
They come across as emotionally open, loyal, and quietly people-focused rather than status- or achievement-focused, which aligns strongly with Hufflepuff. Their attachment to friends and mutuals shows in posts like “i miss my friends” and “i miss my moirail☹️”, emphasizing relationships and emotional bonds. Even small social moments, like “i threw pickles at my friends at lunch and then they all pelted me with tomatos and pickles”, are framed in a warm, goofy way that suggests they value shared fun over looking cool or in control. They also care about specific creators and niche media in a loyal, almost protective way, e.g. “dude clockworkreapers genuinely draws such good iron lung art” and repeated, earnest hype like “I LOVE ALEPH NULL”, which feels more like steadfast fandom than ambitious clout-chasing. While they vent about feeling miserable or exhausted in tweets like “everything is exhausting”, they keep showing up to interact with others and their interests, which fits a Hufflepuff’s persistence and emotional honesty more than the sharper edges typically associated with Slytherin or the showy boldness of Gryffindor.

Your movie

Your song
A fitting song for @theguzieeb is “Welcome to the Black Parade” because it balances melodramatic exhaustion with intense, almost theatrical passion for niche interests. Their timeline swings between low-energy, worn-out posts like “today i feel tired. I want to rest but i dont feel like it”, “everything is exhausting”, and “still miserable i do not want to go to school tomorrw”, and explosive hyperfixations like “I LOVE ALEPH NULL” and “I LOVE PROJECRT MOON”. The song’s themes of pushing through despair and finding meaning in intense fandom-like identity mirror how they latch onto media and characters as emotional anchors, such as “i relate too heavily to sauron yetzar.. yes. thatsm e in troll form.” and “for valentines day i will stay in my room the entire day and daydream about aleph null”. Like the song’s narrative of feeling broken yet still marching on, their posts about physical and emotional discomfort—“my stooomach☹️”, “MY HEAD”—sit right beside loud, meme-y joy and fixation, creating the same bittersweet, dramatic energy that defines Welcome to the Black Parade.

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