
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Adele comes off as emotionally intense, self-aware, and darkly funny in a way that fits Lisa’s mix of sensitivity, brains, and existential crisis. She swings between joking about mental health and chaos, like “i’m so glad my life is somewhat eventful but icl i’d like for it to be positive for once 😄” and the much darker “and if i kms then what”, which feels very Lisa-in-a-depressive-episode. There’s also a nerdy, reflective side: she treats her own timeline like an externalised memory palace in “i scroll through my twitter when i need to remember a story about myself as i have no perception of that and my twitter is a replacement of my brain”, which is exactly the kind of meta self-observation Lisa would make. Her flashes of political/ethical stance, like “bun isreal, dem man r wet wipes”, mirror Lisa’s tendency to plant strong moral flags even if it makes things messy. At the same time, she’s deeply sentimental and easily moved by cuteness or media, like crying over Grogu in “started my period earlier and now sobbing over grogu because he’s so stinking cute”, which fits Lisa’s big, overflowing feelings. Overall, she feels like a more chaotic, extremely-online Lisa Simpson: smart, self-deprecating, politically opinionated, and forever teetering between breakdown and bit.

Your MBTI personality Type
They lean Extrovert (E): they constantly narrate social chaos, parties, travel and random encounters, e.g. talking about coworkers and customers in hospitality and nights out like “day of rest translates to day of drinking in latin” and public mishaps such as “literally walking around in public like this”, suggesting energy from interaction and sharing. Their humour and perception are strongly iNtuitive (N): they jump to odd conceptual links like “rewatching avatar (the last airbender) and i am convinced the timothee chalamet willy wonka was inspired by it, am not elaborating” and use Twitter as a narrative memory, saying “my twitter is a replacement of my brain”. They are clearly Feeling (F)-oriented, centering emotions, relationships, and self-image: they mention crying at games “yer bird cries at beast games”, insecurity and period mood swings like “started my period earlier and now sobbing over grogu because he’s so stinking cute”, and interpersonal drama such as “can’t believe someone said i pay people to do my uni work”. Their life is highly Perceiving (P): impulsive spending and chaos like “accidentally just ordered £300 worth of victoria secret bras whilst trying to sort out my klarna account”, locking themselves out (“omfg i’ve locked myself out of my room”), and last‑minute crisis management around work, travel and uni deadlines such as “deadline season” all suggest spontaneity over structure. Combining a socially expressive, emotionally intense, imaginative and chaotic vibe points most strongly to ENFP.

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Your new Twitter bio
Hospitality survivor, uni deadline dodger & Cornish flood correspondent. Once locked myself out so badly the locksmith crashed on the way.– @thotstoyevsky

Your signature cocktail
This cocktail is bright, chaotic and a bit unhinged—just like getting locksmiths, car crashes and room lockouts all in one saga, à la “omfg i’ve locked myself out of my room” and “the first locksmith i called got into a car crash”. White rum brings the fun, slightly reckless party energy of “day of rest translates to day of drinking in latin” and “the crossfadedness of it all”. Sour cherry liqueur is for the emotional swings and dark humour of “i’m so glad my life is somewhat eventful but icl i’d like for it to be positive for once 😄” and “and if i kms then what”. Cloudy lemonade keeps it playful and soft, matching the whimsy of “yer bird cries at beast games” and maternal vibes of “feeling very maternal over everyone i work with, they are all my babies”. The sea salt & pesto-sugar rim nods to coastal chaos like “storm goretti has my house flooding #cornishlife” and the curative powers of carbs in “seaside hysteria has been cured after a pesto bagel😝… #ilovebagels”. Finally, a splash of blue curaçao captures the surreal, slightly deranged aesthetic of “i k holed while watching law & order and tried helping Olivia solve the case” and the chronically online, self-mythologising brain of “my twitter is a replacement of my brain”.

Your Hogwarts House
Their tweets show strong Hufflepuff energy through warmth, loyalty, and a very people‑oriented outlook. They talk about feeling maternal and protective toward coworkers in “feeling very maternal over everyone i work with, they are all my babies”, which reflects classic Hufflepuff caretaking and loyalty. Even in chaos, there’s a gentle, self-deprecating humour and affection for others, like reminiscing about a hurtful comment but in a soft, reflective way in “tb to when my old best friend said i should stop looking at pinterest girls because i’llnever be as pretty as them”. They find joy in small, cosy moments such as “🍒🥧☕️” and “day of rest translates to day of drinking in latin”, giving off grounded, hang-out-with-your-mates vibes rather than hyper-ambitious Slytherin or intensely cerebral Ravenclaw energy. Their willingness to laugh at their own mishaps—like locking themselves out and chronicling the whole saga starting from “omfg i’ve locked myself out of my room”—shows resilience and down-to-earth relatability rather than a dramatic hero complex, which leans away from Gryffindor. Overall, the dominant traits are loyalty, warmth, and an everyman, hospitality-worker vibe, making Hufflepuff the best fit.

Your movie

Your song
The song girls by beabadoobee fits adele’s chaotic, soft-but-self-destructive, hyper-online vibe. There’s a mix of self-deprecation and tenderness in their tweets, like feeling ugly next to “Pinterest girls” while still being deeply sentimental about people and characters: “tb to when my old best friend said i should stop looking at pinterest girls because i’llnever be as pretty as them” and “she is everything to me”. Their life swings between messy nights, substances, and emotional crises — “i’m never drinking again”, “i’m going to get back into substance abuse”, “i’m so glad my life is somewhat eventful but icl i’d like for it to be positive for once 😄” — which matches the song’s theme of complicated girlhood and messy feelings. At the same time, they’re playful, whimsical, and romantic about friendships and little moments: “feeling very maternal over everyone i work with, they are all my babies” and “we at games room playing sleeping lions”. That blend of emotional volatility, softness, and chaotic humour makes girls an especially fitting soundtrack for @thotstoyevsky.

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