
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
This user most closely matches Lisa Simpson: sharp, self-aware, and very online-introspective while still being dramatic and goofy. Like Lisa, they overthink feelings and relationships, joking about things such as “Why is it genuinely SO hard getting over an online situationship” and “do you ever wanna be someones friend so bad that it actually hurts”, which shows emotional intensity and sensitivity. Their moral/ethical streak and irritation at shallow thinking also feel very Lisa-coded, as seen in “It's like the moment U guys see a sapphic couple U immediately assume it's for show. Can u at least try to take a wlw relationship seriously for once” and “people do say this lol even if you joke about it it does happen and it is a genuine problem to fetishize real life gay relationships”. At the same time, they have a nerdy, hyperfixation-heavy side—constantly talking about animanga, typology, and deep analysis threads like “how i think this song accurately relates to situations in 'the summer hikaru died' — 🧵”—which mirrors Lisa’s obsessive intellectual interests. Their mix of earnest emotion, righteous annoyance, and self-deprecating humor (for example, “i'm the type of person who has at least six different accounts on every platform all with different personas Because i am obsessed with getting good media attention!!!!!😭😭”) fits Lisa as a chronically online teenager in modern form more than the more chaotic Bart or oblivious Homer.

Your MBTI personality Type
They explicitly self-type as “NeTi” and “ILI,” which in common online typology mappings corresponds most closely to INTP. Their behavior fits this: they’re clearly more inward-focused and online-based than centered on big social scenes, and they repeatedly describe intense hyperfixations and having “six different accounts on every platform all with different personas,” which suggests an introverted, image-aware user who prefers mediated interaction over IRL extroversion. Their humor and interests are highly conceptual and fandom/analysis oriented—e.g., wanting to do a full breakdown of a song for The Summer Hikaru Died and saying “how i think this song accurately relates to situations in 'the summer hikaru died' … — 🧵” and “who wants a complete analysis on a song i think accurately matches the summer hikaru died”—pointing to Intuition over concrete Sensing. They also lean toward Thinking: they call out trends and groupthink with lines like “''the switch up' no i hated it from the beginning' Ya and you were too pussy to express that. Stop moving with the trend and think for yourself for once”, and critique behaviors (fetishizing real-life gay couples, mischaracterizing OCs) in an analytical, somewhat blunt tone rather than a purely harmony-seeking one. Their timeline is chaotic, spontaneous, and reactive—jumping between hyperfixations, jokes, form links, and sudden reflections like “Just found out I might actually be aromantic LMFAOO”—which fits a Perceiving style more than structured Judging. Overall, combining their own listed functions (Ne–Ti) with the observed pattern of abstract fandom analysis, detached humor, and flexible lifestyle, INTP is the best match.

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Your new Twitter bio
Xavi • 15 • he/him | Overanalyzing fiction, defending my faves, and accidentally starting discourse. Once made Bakudeku in Gacha Life and admit it proudly.– @timeslain

Your signature cocktail
This chaotic, bright highball is as dramatic and unserious as someone who says “i'm on twitter to JOKE and LIE don't come texting me bout none i said on THIS APP”. The sour-candy rum matches the way they go from feral capslock to soft oversharing in one scroll, like when they confess “do you ever wanna be someones friend so bad that it actually hurts”. Blue curaçao and lychee soda give it a pretty, fruity, slightly over-the-top vibe for the person who admits “im the type of person who will continously accidentally insult u if i think you're pretty”. The sharp hit of yuzu is for their sudden, cutting takes such as “''the switch up' no i hated it from the beginning' Ya and you were too pussy to express that. Stop moving with the trend and think for yourself for once”. Finally, the glitter and popping candy rim embody their hyper-online main-character energy—someone who proudly declares “i'm the type of person who has at least six different accounts on every platform all with different personas Because i am obsessed with getting good media attention!!!!!😭😭” and still somehow makes it endearingly unhinged.

Your Hogwarts House
Their timeline shows a distinctly analytical, idea‑focused way of engaging with fandom and relationships that fits Ravenclaw best. They’re explicitly drawn to deep analysis, as seen when they propose a full breakdown of a song’s thematic parallels with a manga: “how i think this song accurately relates to situations in 'the summer hikaru died' (because i love finding songs that represent something down to the last word) — 🧵#thesummerhikarudied” and “who wants a complete analysis on a song i think accurately matches the summer hikaru died”. They also emphasize pattern‑finding and meta‑thinking about media and fandom, e.g. “I'm sensing a pattern here” and “i'm ngl if i made an oc and it became socially popular just to get mischaracterized i would call a hitman to shoot me dead”, which show concern for interpretation, characterization, and how ideas are treated. Their humor is very word‑ and concept‑driven (for example, the pun in “what does the mechanic say to the ship captain while he's fixing his car? 'does your cargo?'”), and they repeatedly frame things in terms of abstractions like hyperfixation, fetishization, and non‑canon ships, indicating a love of dissecting concepts rather than just reacting. While they have moments of strong feeling and loyalty (defending favorite characters and wlw couples), those are expressed through opinionated analysis and discourse rather than pure bravado or sentiment, which aligns more with Ravenclaw than Gryffindor or Hufflepuff. Overall, the combination of obsessive media analysis, pattern‑spotting, and witty, language‑based posting style is most consistent with a Ravenclaw profile.

Your movie

Your song
The song internet crush fits Xavi because so much of his emotional and social life is clearly tied to being online, from joking about wanting partners in both directions in "i want a boyfriend" and "i want a girlfriend" to admitting how intense online ties feel in "Why is it genuinely SO hard getting over an online situationship". The track is about living through screens, yearning, and parasocial/online affection, which mirrors his comments like "do you ever wanna be someones friend so bad that it actually hurts" and "actually smiling when they text you something means you're fucked im SO deadass". Xavi’s timeline swings between self-aware clowning and real vulnerability, similar to how the song wraps insecurity and neediness in a laid-back, slightly ironic tone—he jokes about being chronically online in "i'm the type of person who has at least six different accounts on every platform all with different personas" while obviously caring a lot about his connections. Even his frustrations with fandom dynamics and being misunderstood, as in "You all just saw me bleed out on the sidewalk and walked away", match the song’s sense of feeling exposed and unheard on the internet. Overall, internet crush captures the mix of humor, hyperfixation, online relationships, and quietly serious feelings that define his presence on Twitter.

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timeslain
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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