
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Jett perfectly embodies the rebellious, hyperactive, and 'edgy' prankster energy of Bart Simpson, often posting with a chaotic sense of humor that borders on the absurd. Much like Bart's constant pursuit of trouble, Jett openly admits, “I love saying dick around. I always dick around. I am dicking around as we speak”. They share a youthful obsession with subcultures and 'cool' aesthetics, frequently engaging in lighthearted online conflict, such as when they tell someone, “Shut up son u don't know nothing bout nothing 😂😂😂”. Jett’s impulsive nature is also evident in their tech usage, questioning, “Genuinely how the fuck did I spend 8 hours on chrome last Sunday i don't even remember what I was doing”. Ultimately, their blend of sarcasm, obsession with band culture, and mischievous personality mirrors the 'Eat My Shorts' attitude of Springfield’s favorite troublemaker.

Your MBTI personality Type
Jett demonstrates high Extroversion (E) through their constant desire for interaction, declaring “I am inspiring all of my oomfs to face reveal I feel like the king everyone bow down” and frequently engaging with followers. Their Intuition (N) is evident in their focus on music subcultures and abstract fandom tropes, such as their MCR ship ranking and interest in fan theories. They lean heavily toward Feeling (F), expressing intense emotional reactions to music and friends, like when they say “ray toro ur voice is so beuatifyl I love you so much”. Finally, their Perceiving (P) nature shows through a spontaneous, chaotic posting style and admissions of distraction, such as “how the fuck did I spend 8 hours on chrome last Sunday i don't even remember what I was doing”.

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Your new Twitter bio
14yo musician & historian in training. I once spent 8 hours on Chrome just to identify a single mid-2000s bass riff. Dedicated to archiving the best of pop-punk.– @Ugliesttidings

Your signature cocktail
This cocktail is a chaotic, 'chud life' experimental masterpiece that mirrors Jett’s high-energy, filterless online presence. The bright neon colors represent their obsession with Spencer Smith's aura, specifically how “Spencer hello can u see us ur quite bright”, while the sour kick captures their legendary hater energy seen in “#petewentzhatetwt” and their disdain for “whatever bullshit there is” in music. The granola bar rim is a mandatory addition because “FAWWWCKKKK I LOVE GRANOLA BARS”, and the fizzing Pop Rocks reflect their panic-posting style, especially when “freaking out so bad” over Ray Toro's voice. It’s a drink for someone who is “constantly thinking about what's gonna happen to cause me to get bad again”, so it hits hard and fast like a 2000s emo breakdown.

Your Hogwarts House
Jett exhibits a strong sense of self-preservation and social exclusivity, famously “soft blocking” followers who don't pay enough attention. Their ambition is rooted in social status, as seen when they crown themselves “the king” for inspiring others, and they aren't afraid to be cunning or abrasive to maintain their brand, telling others to “Actually get out of my face” if they have poor taste. This focus on individual identity is highlighted by their declaration that “my gender is jett”, showing a resourcefulness in self-definition. Ultimately, their desire to “stalk everything on oomfs profile” reveals a calculating and observational nature typical of a Slytherin.

Your movie

Your song
Jett is deeply immersed in mid-2000s emo culture, specifically identifying with #patdtwt and expressing that “The transition from holy spaces to northern downpour makes me emotional”. The song’s nostalgic and melancholic themes mirror Jett's anxiety about their current happiness, as they admit, “I cant be happy without thinking about what bad thing will happen to me next”. Their intense fandom for Spencer Smith and Ryan Ross makes this specific track—often cited as the band's most sentimental work—the perfect anthem for someone who feels “too new” to the scene and is constantly “stalking everything” to catch up on history. Ultimately, Northern Downpour captures the blend of obsession, friendship, and adolescent dread that Jett displays throughout their timeline.

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Ugliesttidings
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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