Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Passionate fan: Deep, consistent love for Blur and related media, e.g. “here comes that panic attack #HAPPYBLURVERSARY” and “blur is like what if 4 musical genius’s were also gay and did drugs”.
- Affectionate partner: Speaks fondly and playfully about their girlfriend, like “my gf is blonde w green eyes and i have brown hair and brown eyes” and “scariest text message i’ve ever received from my gf”.
- Creative humor: Uses vivid, funny scenarios such as “when i go to england im gonna go shopping in portobello road… and unlock the emperor’s gate” and “imagine trying to get a hamburger and graham coxon is your waiter…”.
- Community‑oriented: Engages actively with fandom and friends, e.g. “I LOVE EVERYONE SO MUCH” and inviting others with “if anyone else on blurtwt practices a bit of witchcraft dm me what ur doing for imbolc”.
- Self‑aware growth: Reflects on behavior and adjusts, like “realizing ive been fighting with ppl that are over 30 like this isn’t fun anymore it actually makes me so sad” followed by “okay i chose peace now srry abt all that”.
Weaknesses:
- Hostile conflict: Tends to escalate fandom clashes with insults, e.g. “incest lover calling me a loser” and “i wouldn’t wipe my ass with a liam tweet that man is a loser racist capitalist misogynist jdjrhdhd”.
- Angry posting: Uses intense, reactive language when upset, as in “bro omg FUCK those oasis fans” and “im so mad lol”.
- Fandom overinvestment: Emotional health tied heavily to band drama, e.g. “im so unbelievably depressed save me graham coxon crow sit on blood tree” and “here comes that panic attack #HAPPYBLURVERSARY”.
- Online burnout: Recognizes distress from constant discourse, like “realizing ive been fighting with ppl that are over 30 like this isn’t fun anymore it actually makes me so sad”.
- Harsh language: Frequently leans on crude or aggressive phrasing, e.g. “writing a song about an imaginary girlfriend that dumps you …. pathetic isn’t strong enough” and “girls jack off too”.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
They read as a very online, emotionally intense, artsy nerd, which maps closest to Lisa Simpson. Like Lisa with her sax and obscure records, they’re deeply invested in music and creativity, constantly gushing over Blur and related artists, e.g. “blur are my best friends ☆” and “his voice in this drives me crazy holy shit”. They also show a thoughtful, slightly witchy/intellectual side that Lisa would approve of, such as “if anyone else on blurtwt practices a bit of witchcraft dm me what ur doing for imbolc”. At the same time, they’re outspoken and moralistic about sexism and fandom politics, much like Lisa’s righteous rants, for example “bro omg FUCK those oasis fans… ur a bunch of bootlickers” and “i wouldn’t wipe my ass with a liam tweet that man is a loser racist capitalist misogynist”. Their mix of sensitivity, passionate fandom, and principled anger fits Lisa more than any other main character.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENFP
They lean Extraverted because they’re highly interactive with fandoms, friends, and their girlfriend, often narrating their day and emotions publicly, e.g. “I LOVE EVERYONE SO MUCH” and “realizing ive been fighting with ppl that are over 30 like this isn’t fun anymore it actually makes me so sad”, which shows an outward, socially engaged focus. Their humor and interests suggest Intuition over Sensing: they spin imaginative, hyperbolic scenarios like “when i go to england im gonna go shopping in portobello road get off on the westway roll down primrose hill… and unlock the emperor’s gate” and interpret music in big-picture, life-changing terms such as “it’s literally lifechanging”. They’re clearly Feeling-oriented, prioritizing values and emotional reactions over detached logic: they rage on moral grounds about Oasis fans in “bro omg FUCK those oasis fans. like ur fav literally encouraged ppl to harass a young woman…” and gush affectionately about Blur and their partner in posts like “ur so gr8 and ily”. The tone is more Perceiving than Judging: they show spontaneity, changing their mind (e.g. “i used to think bang succccckkeddd but now i like it”), starting things chaotically like their strawpage (“hit publish on my strawpage and it just deleted itself”), and making impulsive plans such as “okay tonight im opening my puter and finally making a strawpage”. Altogether, a socially expressive, imaginative, value-driven, and spontaneous style aligns best with ENFP.
Some pickup lines for you
- When you come to England to shop Portobello Road, roll down Primrose Hill and unlock the emperor’s gate, can I be the rank taxi driver who ‘accidentally’ keeps taking you to Blur landmarks instead?
- You said Blur is ‘what if 4 musical geniuses were also gay and did drugs’—so what does that make you, because you’re clearly the secret fifth member that opened your own floodgates with lofi and hard punk.
- Your gf being blonde with green eyes and you having brown hair and brown eyes is already peak rom-com casting, but I’m just saying… if you ever need a Canadian extra to take their boots off in the doctor’s office and third-wheel your love story, I’m available.
- You called yourself the Rumpelstiltskin of blurtwt, but I don’t need to guess your name—miss tembo is already spinning strawpages into gold and I’m just here hoping you’ll spin me into your ‘ur so gr8 and ily’ list next.
- You listening to Norah Jones, practicing witchcraft for Imbolc, and crying before work over a 32-year-old British man describing your whole life is honestly the most beautiful, soft chaos ever—no punchline, I just think that’s exactly the kind of person I’d like to fall for.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Canadian Blur archivist in my 20s, part-time witch & playlist curator. Once rage-baited a whole fandom and called it career development.– @ur_s0_gr8
Your signature cocktail
Girls Jack Off Too (But Make It Blur)
This cocktail is loud, chaotic, and a little unhinged, like someone who declares “you only like blur bc they’re pretty boys” newsflash buddy.. girls jack off too without blinking. Smoky mezcal is for the industrial/post‑punk edge they mention in “i listen to more industrial/metal i guess than punk music. post punk lol”. Elderflower liqueur adds a soft, romantic note for the gf with green eyes and all the cute devotion in “my gf is blonde w green eyes and i have brown hair and brown eyes”. Sour cherry liqueur brings in melodrama and obsession, echoing the emotional spiral of “here comes that panic attack #HAPPYBLURVERSARY” and the way they get so worked up over blur and fandom wars in “successfully rage baited that whole fandom i made my father proud”. Fresh lemon juice keeps it sharp and a bit bitter for their blunt, righteous rants like “i wouldn’t wipe my ass with a liam tweet that man is a loser racist capitalist misogynist jdjrhdhd”. Topping it with dry grapefruit soda makes it fizzy and hyper, capturing the manic, meme‑y blurposting of “blur is like what if 4 musical genius’s were also gay and did drugs” and the chaotic travel fantasy of “when i go to england im gonna go shopping in portobello road get off on the westway…”.
Your Hogwarts House
Gryffindor
They show a very strong tendency to loudly stand up for their beliefs, especially in conflicts and fandom drama, which is very Gryffindor. For example, they openly call out Oasis/Liam fans with zero fear of backlash, saying “i wouldn’t wipe my ass with a liam tweet that man is a loser racist capitalist misogynist jdjrhdhd” and “bro omg FUCK those oasis fans. like ur fav literally encouraged ppl to harass a young woman and now she deactivated all bc she said ticket prices were too high”. Their willingness to "rage bait" an entire fandom (“successfully rage baited that whole fandom i made my father proud”) and proudly frame themselves as a provocateur (“i am the Rumpelstiltskin of blurtwt”) suggests impulsive, confrontational bravery rather than quiet cunning. Even when they realize they’ve been fighting with people much older, they frame it as sad but only then "choose peace" (“realizing ive been fighting with ppl that are over 30… okay i chose peace now srry abt all that”), which fits the hot-headed, reactive Gryffindor pattern. Their passionate defenses of artists they love, intense emotional reactions (“im so unbelievably depressed save me graham coxon crow sit on blood tree”), and tendency to lead the charge in discourse all align more with bold, feeling-first Gryffindor energy than with the calculation of Slytherin or the studious detachment of Ravenclaw.
Your movie
Your song
Charmless Man - Blur
The best song for them is Charmless Man by Blur. They’re deeply immersed in Blur fandom, from saying “here comes that panic attack #HAPPYBLURVERSARY” to calling themselves “the Rumpelstiltskin of blurtwt”, so a quintessential Britpop track fits perfectly. The song’s witty, slightly bitchy narration matches their sense of humor when they say things like “blur is like what if 4 musical genius’s were also gay and did drugs” and when they gleefully roast Liam Gallagher with “i wouldn’t wipe my ass with a liam tweet that man is a loser racist capitalist misogynist”. Charmless Man skewers pretentious, posh guys, which aligns with their anti-bootlicker, anti-Oasis-fan stance in “bro omg FUCK those oasis fans… ur a bunch of bootlickers”. The track’s bright, catchy surface with a slightly mean, clever undercurrent mirrors how they can be very loving to their circle—like “ur so gr8 and ily”—while still being razor-sharp and sarcastic toward the people and ideas they dislike.
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