Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Emotionally expressive: Openly shares feelings about sadness, nostalgia, and affection, like missing loved ones in “sdds do meu anjo” and feeling heartbroken in multiple “❤️🩹” tweets.
- Self-aware: Reflects on own neurodivergence and work context in “foda é que sendo professor e neurodivertido eu vejo de longe um dos meus” and jokes about personal habits in “infelizmente eu sou exatamente assim”.
- Dedicated teacher: Shows commitment to students and difficult conditions, e.g. “trabalhando onde não tem esgoto encanado e trocando fralda de criança com lombriga vou usar sim” and affection for the kids in “adoro a criançada falando umas coisas assim me sinto vivo”.
- Humorous observer: Uses humor and irony to process daily life, like laughing hysterically at memories in “às vezes eu lembro disso e rio sozinho histericamente” and making fun of situations in “professores de férias fazendo loucuras: eu e kevin jantando hambúrguer e almoçando burger king”.
- Passionate fan: Shows deep enthusiasm and knowledge for music, especially MCR, e.g. analyzing tracks in “eu sempre pulo cancer porque pra mim é a música mais filha da puta do tbp inteiro” and excitement for shows in “aos poucos tá caindo a ficha que falta menos de um mês pro mcr”.
Weaknesses:
- Emotional volatility: Tweets oscillate between humor and distress, mentioning incurable ‘January blues’ in “infelizmente os january blues estão incuráveis” and anticipating ‘desenvolver mais problemas psicológicos’ in “não vai ter jeito, vou desenvolver mais problemas psicológicos”.
- Self-neglect: Hints at poor self-care, like wrecked sleep in “nada melhor que vagabundagem pra desregular o sono” and heavy joking about cigarettes in “cigarro desgraçado”.
- Harsh language: Often uses aggressive or vulgar phrasing, such as “vai dar esse teu cu sujo” and strong insults toward figures in “se o gerard é tão burro tão problemático tão casado com uma vagabunda…”.
- Pessimistic outlook: Frequently frames situations negatively, like expecting more mental issues in “não vai ter jeito, vou desenvolver mais problemas psicológicos” and describing emotional states as ‘infelizmente’ or hopeless in “infelizmente os january blues estão incuráveis”.
- Anxiety-prone: Shows worry or dread about future events and concepts, e.g. “não quero dormir tenho medo do foucault” and stress over tickets in “acontecerá de eu não conseguir ingresso”.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
They read as a very Lisa-coded adult: bookish, politically and socially aware, and constantly overthinking everything while still being deeply emotional and dramatic. As a teacher who jokes about working in tough conditions and being neurodivergent, like in “eu trabalhando onde não tem esgoto encanado e trocando fralda de criança com lombriga vou usar sim” and “foda é que sendo professor e neurodivertido eu vejo de longe um dos meus”, they echo Lisa’s mix of cynicism and genuine care for kids. Their love of overanalyzing culture and theory shows up in things like “não quero dormir tenho medo do foucault” and joking about how studying history ruined the word “fetiche” in “ter cursado história estragou a palavra 'fetiche' pra mim”, which fits Lisa’s intellectual angst. At the same time, they’re very emotionally intense and melodramatic about music and fandom—see their My Chemical Romance obsession in tweets like “aos poucos tá caindo a ficha que falta menos de um mês pro mcr e pra ver meus broder” and “eu sempre pulo cancer porque pra mim é a música mais filha da puta do tbp inteiro”—which parallels Lisa’s tendency to feel everything very deeply. Their mix of idealism, burnout, and dark humor, like in “infelizmente os january blues estão incuráveis”, makes them feel less like carefree Bart chaos and much more like a grown-up, emo version of Lisa Simpson.
Your MBTI personality Type
INFP
They lean Introvert: their fun revolves around inner emotional life, media, and a small circle of close people rather than big social scenes, like when they talk about crying to music “chorando no ápice do verão com uma música dobre dawn of the dead”, smoking alone at work “eu no chat dos meus amigos no trabalho fumando no cantinho da caixa d'água da escola chorando”, and missing specific loved ones or pets “sdds do meu anjo”. Their strong focus on meaning, symbolism, and narratives over concrete detail points to Intuition: their bio itself is metaphorical (“the bird fights its way out of the egg”), and they obsess over lyrics and emotional impact of songs like “como pode juliet loves the beat and the lust it commands drop the dagger and lather the blood on your hands, romeo COMO” and treating albums as cohesive works “tem dias que eu quero desfrutar do álbum como obra completamente”. They are clearly Feeling-dominant: they center hurt, attachment, and empathy with kids and friends—e.g., the heartbroken posts “❤️🩹”, their softness about students “foda é que sendo professor e neurodivertido eu vejo de longe um dos meus”, and their visceral emotional responses to music “SE EU SOU TÃO ERRADO... COMO É QUE VOCÊ OUVE A NOITE TODAAAAA CARALHO”. Finally, they read as Perceiving: they embrace spontaneity and messy life rather than rigid planning, seen in posts about impulsive trips and spending “adoro show adoro viagem adoro gastar adoro pensar depois”, joking about developing more psychological problems “não vai ter jeito, vou desenvolver mais problemas psicológicos”, and chaotic sleep/vacation habits “nada melhor que vagabundagem pra desregular o sono”. Putting this together, their introspective, emotionally intense, idealistic, and somewhat chaotic vibe best matches INFP.
Some pickup lines for you
- If your Starbucks coffee smelled like a litter box, that’s just the universe begging you to let me make you a proper chimarrão instead. I promise the only coisa com cheiro de areia is the beach we escape to after the show.
- You skipping ‘Cancer’ on TBP most days but still listening when you want the full obra… I volunteer as tribute to be your emotional support emo, holding your hand through the tracklist and through the MCR concert chaos in Pelotas.
- You, neurodivergent history-cursed teacher afraid of Foucault at night, smoking by the school’s water tank, crying in the work chat… let me be the annoying co-worker who brings you decent coffee, listens to your kids’ quotes, and reminds you that even January blues eventually get tenure.
- Since you’re already carnavaling in Pelotas for MCR, what do you think about turning it into a double feature: Gerard on stage first, then us re-enacting ‘Juliet loves the beat and the lust it commands’ in the crowd – purely for academic analysis, historiador’s honor.
- You said professors on vacation doing ‘loucuras’ is just you and Kevin having hamburgers for dinner and Burger King for lunch; if that’s your idea of wild, imagine how decadent it’d be if we added ‘holding hands on the way back home’ to the research project.
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
History teacher, MCR apologist & January blues specialist. Once smoked by the school water tank on break and called it professional development.– @ursinhopluto
Your signature cocktail
Neurodivertido January Blues Fizz
This cocktail is wired and exhausted at the same time, like a teacher who cries to horror-movie songs in peak summer, nodding to their vibe of “chorando no ápice do verão com uma música dobre dawn of the dead”. The dark roast cold brew is for the caffeine-fueled school days, complete with smoking breaks by the water tank, mirroring “eu no chat dos meus amigos no trabalho fumando no cantinho da caixa d'água da escola chorando”. Smoked-tea cachaça brings the slightly self-destructive cigarette edge and chaotic humor of “cigarro desgraçado” and “vai dar esse teu cu sujo”. Chimarrão syrup and lime soda honor the southern-BR teacher life, from mourning a dead kettle in “rip chaleira elétrica que raissinha me deu… boas águas pra cházinho e chimarrão” to surviving minimalism-hating, glitter-coded fandom trips like “adoro show adoro viagem adoro gastar adoro pensar depois”. Finally, the sour cherry and a glittery fizz layer in the emotional whiplash of loving MCR to the point of near-madness, as in “aos poucos tá caindo a ficha que falta menos de um mês pro mcr e pra ver meus broder” and “infelizmente os january blues estão incuráveis”. This is not a neat classic: it’s loud, a bit bitter, strangely comforting, and absolutely neurodivertido, just like them in “totalmente neurodivertido”.
Your Hogwarts House
Hufflepuff
Lin consistently centers work, care, and loyalty in a way that is quintessentially Hufflepuff. They talk about being a teacher in a difficult environment and still justifying using PPE for the sake of the kids, saying they work “where there’s no sewage and changing diapers of kids with worms” and “I’m going to use it yes” “eu trabalhando onde não tem esgoto encanado e trocando fralda de criança com lombriga vou usar sim”, which shows perseverance and responsibility rather than glory-seeking. They describe the chaotic reality of being a teacher but with affection and humor, e.g. “teachers on vacation doing crazy things: me and kevin having hamburgers for dinner and burger king for lunch” “professores de férias fazendo loucuras: eu e kevin jantando hambúrguer e almoçando burger king”, which reflects a grounded, work-focused identity. Their empathy for neurodivergent kids—“being a teacher and neurodivergent I can see one of mine from afar” “foda é que sendo professor e neurodivertido eu vejo de longe um dos meus”—and the way they cherish their students’ odd remarks “adoro a criançada falando umas coisas assim me sinto vivo” reveals deep kindness and loyalty. Even their emotional posts about loved ones, like missing “my angel” “sdds do meu anjo”, fit a pattern of attachment and care over ego or ambition. While they’re witty and a bit caustic, the core throughline of their timeline is dedication to others, emotional endurance, and a very Hufflepuff sense of sticking with people and responsibilities even when it’s hard.
Your movie
Your song
The Sharpest Lives - My Chemical Romance
The best fit is The Sharpest Lives by My Chemical Romance, since MCR is clearly a central obsession and this song captures their chaotic, self-deprecating, but very alive vibe. They talk constantly about MCR, from wondering “de onde veio o dinheiro do nathan fã de mcr” to looping albums with “ouço o revenge e o stomachaches 48h seguidas de graça, imagina por dinheiro”](https://x.com/ursinhopluto/status/2010861339208507810). The song’s themes of excess, emotional volatility, and dark humor mirror tweets like “adoro show adoro viagem adoro gastar adoro pensar depois” and the dramatic angst of “não vai ter jeito, vou desenvolver mais problemas psicológicos”. Their bio, “the bird fights its way out of the egg… who would be born must first destroy a world,” fits the song’s self-destructive, rebirth-through-damage energy. Even their January gloom in “infelizmente os january blues estão incuráveis” echoes the song’s mix of depression, nihilism, and grim humor that still somehow feels defiant and alive.
Your time travel destination
Your video game
Your spirit animal
Your (un)funny joke
Your superpower
Your fictional best friend
Your dream vacation
Your alternate career path
Your celebrity match
Did you enjoy your Horoscope?
Your horoscope is 21 days old! Generate a better one from your latest tweets, unlock more insights and use a smarter pro AI!
