Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Emotionally aware: Openly describes complex feelings, like crying and self-soothing in “the feeling of wiping your eyelashes dry after crying by blinking and letting them brush over your finger”.
- Affectionate: Frequently expresses love and gratitude toward online friends, as in “i love my moots all of u are so cute and sweet and u WILL reach ur body goals” and “very grateful for all of u, this place gives me a place to fall back to and i looove this baka life”.
- Self-reflective: Notices her own behavior and mental state, like realizing low intake affects thinking in “i need to up my intake or something i just looked at a post from an hour ago where i mistyped 2 words and also accidentally said the antonym of the word i meant to”.
- Playful humor: Uses jokes and playful language even when stressed, for example “period still hasnt come btw who impregnated me” and “charlie charlie kirky i just popped a perky”.
- Goal oriented: Sets specific weight and behavioral goals, like pinning a milestone in “UNPINNING AT 130LB ! (´｡• ᵕ •｡)” and tracking binge-free days in “i think its that time in the night where i can say i am. heh. 1 day binge free.”.
Weaknesses:
- Self-destructive: Openly endorses extreme restriction and laxative use, such as “gonna drink lax tea after school today hashtag YAY!” and “would we consider the 10 cals i ate today worthy of calling my fast broken”.
- Body hatred: Describes her body harshly, calling herself “chubspo” in “at least if i was like, fat fat there would be something interesting about me . im just chubspo brah” and tweeting “IM HUGE IM HUGE IM MASSSSIVVVEEEUHH”.
- Violent anger: Expresses extreme hostility toward her father, like “i wish my maga fuckface bitchass hoebag father would actually die” and “his abusive ass needs to be slimed the fuck out literally somebody put a hit on him before i do”.
- Disordered eating: Frames restriction as central to identity and comfort, for example “all you can do is find comfort in weight loss” and celebrating being “undercover disordered” in “being undercover disordered literally feels so sneaky Heh i love my life”.
- Self-harmful urges: Mentions harming herself physically and mentally, like “beating myself until i bruise nnghh djdbksjeeheeehehHEHEHHHDHHH” and despairing about weight in “back to 140.2 lbs i need to die”.
Your Simpsons character
Lisa Simpson
Vani most closely matches Lisa Simpson: a smart, emotionally intense teen who feels out of place and copes by overthinking and fixating on goals. Like Lisa, she’s highly self-critical and idealistic about self-improvement, shown in posts like “all you can do is find comfort in weight loss” and “UNPINNING AT 130LB ! (´｡• ᵕ •｡) #edtwt #ricecaketwt”. She has intense family conflict and resentment toward her father, echoing Lisa’s deep but fraught feelings about Homer: “i wish my maga fuckface bitchass hoebag father would actually die” and “his abusive ass needs to be slimed the fuck out literally somebody put a hit on him before i do”. Her sensitivity and tendency to retreat into bathrooms or online spaces when overwhelmed, as in “just ran to the school bathroom to sulk for a bit…” and “sitting in the school bathroom on edtwt this really is the life”, parallel Lisa’s habit of withdrawing to process big emotions. Finally, her blend of dark humor, introspection, and trying to find structure through journaling and school (“im going to do my journaling for the night (//▽//) yyyeyeeyyyeyeyeyyyy then study time”) fits Lisa’s vibe as the overburdened, hyper-aware kid trying to make sense of everything.
Your MBTI personality Type
ENFP
They lean Extraverted: they constantly interact with an online community, clearly energized by sharing feelings and getting responses, e.g. “goodnight edtwt (.❛ ᴗ ❛.) very grateful for all of u, this place gives me a place to fall back to and i looove this baka life” and “hai edtwt i overate a lot last night… its regionals hehe”. Their focus is more Intuitive than Sensing: they obsess over meanings, identity, and future self-image rather than just facts, like “cant wait until im super skinnay and they feel #worried when they finally see me again” and “losing weight in hopes of being chilly in the oregon summertime”. They are clearly Feeling-dominant, reacting emotionally and relationally rather than logically, such as “told my friend i need to walk more anf she goes shut up youre not fat hoe i just said i needed to walk UR CALLING ME FAT” and the intense emotional outbursts toward their father in “i wish my maga fuckface bitchass hoebag father would actually die”. Finally, they seem more Perceiving than Judging: their routines are chaotic and impulsive (binges, sudden restriction changes, last‑minute decisions) as seen in “just binged until i felt tummy sick gahahaha KILLME KILL ME” and “broke my supposed 24hr fast 17 hrs in because i absent mindedly accepted a uv glow sourpatch kid from my friend”. Their playful, dramatic tone, quick shifts in mood, and social, expressive style all line up well with an ENFP profile.
Some pickup lines for you
- If you’re ‘bleaching your hair maroon and feeling euphoric,’ imagine how euphoric you’d feel if we matched hair dye and trauma-dumped about our dads together between theater rehearsals.
- You said you ‘lost a whole pound from pissing’—careful, if we start talking, you might lose track of time too. That’s at least, like, 600 emotional calories burned right there.
- You, in the school bathroom on edtwt, feeling ‘#euphoric’—what if next time you’re hiding in there, it’s because you’re texting me about how we’re both low-key funnier than everyone in your gym class.
- You’re worried you’ll skip the ‘cute small girl era’ and go straight to ‘bony square,’ but I already saw the tweet where you realized you look thinner than the girl you envy—plot twist: you’re already the main character, and I’m just trying to be cast as the love interest.
- You made your phone praise you every time you open a restricting or BMI app; if you let me text you instead, I’ll send push notifications like: ‘Achievement unlocked: vani went 24 hours without calling herself ‘chubspo’ and my heart grew three sizes.’
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
16 | theatre kid, Oregon weather enthusiast & chronic journaler. Once dropped my entire dinner on the floor and still called it a win.– @vaniskcals
Your signature cocktail
Binge-Free Batgirl Fizz
The blackberry sparkling soda with a splash of cola matches vani’s bat aesthetic and slightly chaotic late-night energy, echoing her love for edtwt and calling it her safe space in “goodnight edtwt (.❛ ᴗ ❛.) i luuuuuv you!”. A punch of sour cherry liqueur reflects her sharp humor and rage at her father in “i wish my maga fuckface bitchass hoebag father would actually die”, giving the drink a tart emotional kick under the sweetness. The soft vanilla meringue foam on top is a nod to her search for low-cal sweetness in “what does edtwt think of meringue as a lowcal high protein sugary craving snack ? (.❛ ᴗ ❛.)”, symbolizing the way she sugar-coats deep distress with cute typing and kaomoji. A bright lemon twist cuts through, representing her self-aware, sometimes self-deprecating clarity in “at least if i was like, fat fat there would be something interesting about me . im just chubspo brah”. Finally, a pinch of edible glitter captures the performative, online-confidence sparkle of “made a custom notif so whenever i open a restricting , fasting , weight tracking or bmi app my phone praises me 🥹🥹”, turning all that messy, buzzing energy into something dazzling in the glass.
Your Hogwarts House
Slytherin
They show strong ambition and fixation on transformation, centering their identity on becoming "super skinnay" and even wanting their sisters to be "#worried" when they see the change, as in “cant wait until im super skinnay and they feel #worried when they finally see me again ❤️😝😝”. This ambition is tied to a competitive, win-or-lose mindset about their body and weight, visible in tweets like “SCALE SAYS 134???ALL I DO IS WIN WIN WIN” and “down 3 lbs from tuesday 👀👀👀👀👀👀 loving my #life”. They’re also highly resourceful and strategic in pursuing their goals, customizing their phone so that “whenever i open a restricting , fasting , weight tracking or bmi app my phone praises me”, and carefully planning OMAD, snacks, and low-cal options like “any lowcal waffle brands / recipes ? 🥹”. There’s a sharp, sometimes ruthless edge in how they talk about others, such as calling their mom "fatspo" in “watching my morbidly obese mother snacking at any given moment of the day is actual irl insane fatspo” and expressing intense hostility toward their father in “his abusive ass needs to be slimed the fuck out literally somebody put a hit on him before i do”. While they show affection for their online community in “i love my moots all of u are so cute and sweet and u WILL reach ur body goals”, that care is still framed around shared ambition and body goals rather than pure nurture, reinforcing a Slytherin style of loyalty based on common aims. Overall, the combination of intense self-focused ambition, strategic behavior, and a harsh, survivalist outlook aligns most closely with Slytherin.
Your movie
Your song
jealousy, jealousy - Olivia Rodrigo
A well‑suited song for them is jealousy, jealousy by Olivia Rodrigo, because so much of their timeline is about comparing their body and worth to others. They talk about envying another girl’s body, noting that they looked thinner but still spiraling about it: “i just ???? looked at a front view of me and this girl that i ENVY for her body and figure and i look THINNER than her ?????????”. Their self‑hatred and fixation on being smaller shows up constantly in posts like “at least if i was like, fat fat there would be something interesting about me . im just chubspo brah” and “cant wait to be a super thin girl who says 'omg sorry i cant eat that much, too big of a portion' even though im fucking starving the shit outta myself”. The song’s themes of feeling ugly, inadequate, and obsessed with other people’s bodies mirror their edtwt mindset and their desire for others to worry about their weight, like in “cant wait until im super skinnay and they feel #worried when they finally see me again”.
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