wallybert
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Politically:
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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Strengths and Weaknesses
Strengths:
- Observant: He notices small absurdities (from pharmacy scenes to voting trends) and turns them into pointed tweets, as when he recounts strangers 'standing in the pharmacy section screaming... demanding proper Preparation H'.
- Witty: His quick image captions and recurring 'KITTEH!!!!' exclamations show a playful, punchy sense of humor, for example the repeated joyful 'KITTEH!!!!' posts.
- Practically Skilled: He writes about soil drainage and gardening—'all the garden plants want soils that drain... guess the clay soils are just for weeds'—and notes GUI work ergonomics, showing hands‑on competence.
- Civic-Minded: Frequent critiques like 'the US government has a demonstrated inability to manage anything very well' and comments about voters show engagement with public life and standards for governance.
- Culturally Literate: Quoting the Blade Runner monologue ('all those moments will be lost... time to die') and saying 'Oxbridge edyumakated' reveal a wide range of literary/cinematic references and a fondness for classical snark.
Weaknesses:
- Abrasive: His blunt, sometimes crude calls-out (e.g., mocking a shopper demanding hemorrhoid suppositories) can alienate people who prefer gentler phrasing.
- Cynical: He frequently declares societal decline—'idiocy seems prevalent, near rampant'—which can make him pessimistic and resistant to optimism.
- Impulsive Posting: Many quick reaction tweets and all‑caps exclamations like 'KITTEH!!!!' suggest a tendency to post first and filter later, risking tone issues.
- Prone to Mockery: He delights in ridiculing public fools (e.g., 'pitiful that so many voters... are so ignorant'), which can come off as unforgiving rather than constructive.
- Physically Strained: He mentions 'wrist AND shoulder pain' from GUI work, indicating a real physical limitation that affects comfort and productivity.
Your Simpsons character
Moe Szyslak
Moe's curmudgeonly, lonely, and frequently sarcastic persona matches Wally's 'Despised / Lonesome' broNouns and frequent grumpy humor. Like Moe, Wally revels in blunt one-liners, social isolation and a darkly comic view of people ('pitiful that so many voters... are so ignorant'), and he cycles through pop-culture references and bar‑room style commentary — the sort of gruff exterior that occasionally hides a softer cat-fondness (here, literal cats).
Your MBTI personality Type
INTJ
INTJ fits his solitary, analytical and skeptical communication style. Introversion shows through 'dwelling in the wilderness' and 'Lonesome' self-labeling; intuition is visible in cultural and conceptual leaps (Blade Runner quote: 'all those moments will be lost in time...'); thinking is evident in blunt critiques like 'the US government has a demonstrated inability to manage anything very well' and a moral-logic post about 'By Any means necessary' being unethical; judging appears in his pronounced standards and categorical statements about voters and institutions ('pitiful that so many voters... are so ignorant'), reflecting a desire for order and competence rather than open-ended social experimentation.
Some pickup lines for you
- If you were a cat I'd shout 'KITTEH!!!!' and then adopt you on the spot — same energy, same forever home?
- I can fix your mouse-hand pain with a home-cooked stew and a lap full of purring cats — interested in a demo?
- Forget Oxbridge — I studied the curriculum of your smile; can I audit your heart?
- They say 'not my circus' — but I’d gladly bring popcorn and a cat if your circus needs company.
- You've got the look of someone who appreciates a curmudgeon with a garden and good taste; dinner and soil testing this weekend?
Your 5 Emojis
Your new Twitter bio
Curmudgeon in the wilderness | ex‑GUI hands, now gardening and cat curator | snarky takes on politics & human stupidity | 'not my circus' energy, Oxbridge‑tinged sarcasm | pics, cats, and blunt truths– @wallybert
Your signature cocktail
Lonesome Curmudgeon
This smoky, slightly bitter cocktail reflects his wilderness curmudgeon persona and late-night cultural riffs (the peaty Scotch for bleak landscapes and 'Blade Runner' melancholy, the coffee liqueur nodding to late GUI‑dev hours and wrist pain), while the lemon twist brightens the bitterness like his flashes of humor ('KITTEH!!!!'). A smoked salt rim mirrors his penchant for earthy gardening notes ('all the garden plants want soils that drain...').
Your Hogwarts House
Ravenclaw
Ravenclaw fits because he prizes wit, knowledge and independent thought over blind loyalty or mob action. He signals intellectual tastes and cinematic/literary references—e.g., quoting the Roy Batty monologue ('all those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.... time to die') and wryly noting 'Oxbridge edyumakated'—which track with Ravenclaw curiosity. His critiques of governmental competence ('the US government has a demonstrated inability to manage anything very well') are analytical rather than purely emotional, and his practical problem awareness (gardening tips, GUI ergonomics) points to the Ravenclaw blend of theory and craft.
Your movie
Your song
Mad World - Tears for Fears / Gary Jules
The song's melancholic, wry view of a bewildering world matches his frequent rueful comments ('idiocy seems prevalent, near rampant' and 'near future seems so dim'). Its reflective tone pairs with his Blade Runner quote and overall weary wit — a melancholy anthem for someone who can still laugh at absurdity while calling out societal failings.
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