
Strengths and Weaknesses

Your Simpsons character
Wilson Bethel’s mix of earnest political engagement, thoughtful reflection, and dry humor lines up most closely with Lisa Simpson. Like Lisa, he’s deeply invested in activism and democracy, from organizing door-knocking for Beto O’Rourke and urging people to vote in multiple tweets like “TWEETING IS NOT ENOUGH” and “Vote early!!!”. He also shows a bookish, reflective side and admiration for thoughtful media, such as his 2017 reading list and sharing a moving Mr. Rogers piece via “this exceptional piece of writing about this extraordinary human being reminded my what grace… looks like”. At the same time, his sharp, often nerdy humor about politics—like the elaborate Trump mini-screenplay starting with “INT. WEST WING LAST NIGHT” and quips like “Twitter is where I go to watch the social fabric unravel in real time.”—feels very Lisa-esque: smart, satirical, and morally driven. Even his bio, “Free Palestine 🇵🇸,” reflects Lisa’s consistent alignment with social justice causes and concern for people beyond her own immediate world.

Your MBTI personality Type
They lean Extraverted: they promote events, invite fans to interact, and enjoy public engagement, e.g. rallying volunteers in Texas with “Texans! Who wants to door knock for #TeamBeto this weekend?? I’LL TRAIN YA MYSELF!” and offering theatre tickets with “I’ve got 5 pairs of tickets for tomorrow’s matinee performance of #TheLastMatch ! … @ me to claim em.”. Their humor and commentary show a strong Intuitive side, constantly riffing on big-picture politics and culture rather than concrete minutiae, like the satire thread starting with “INT. WEST WING LAST NIGHT The carpeted halls are empty. Donny stalks, alone, muttering to himself.” and the self-aware meta line “Twitter is where I go to watch the social fabric unravel in real time.”. They prioritize Feeling values—empathy, justice, and emotional resonance—through activism and cause-driven posts such as “If every tweet you saw today… were 1 door knocked on… imagine what our country might look like… TWEETING IS NOT ENOUGH” and warm appreciation like “HUGE Thank you to all you wonderful #AllRise fans out there. … We appreciate you.”. Finally, they appear Perceiving: their feed is playful, improvisational, and driven by spontaneity over rigid structure, from absurd observations like “Consider the banana: It just sits there on the counter, CONSUMING ITS OWN SKIN…” to the impulsive, road-trip activism vibe of “Heading coast to coast in the Bullseye mobile; tryin’ to drum up some interest in democracy in a hamlet near you...”. Together, this blend of high-energy outreach, values-driven political engagement, imaginative humor, and go-with-the-flow spontaneity fits ENFP best.

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Your new Twitter bio
Actor, occasional director & chronic door-knocker for democracy. Once lost a motorcycle, gained a supervillain. Opinions, dad jokes & Bullseyes my own.– @WilsonBethel

Your signature cocktail
The rye whiskey brings a strong, no-nonsense kick, nodding to his sharp, politically engaged side and his long Obama-vs-Donny satire thread starting with “1. INT. WEST WING LAST NIGHT”. Cold brew coffee mirrors his relentless, on-the-road activism energy from “Heading coast to coast in the Bullseye mobile; tryin’ to drum up some interest in democracy in a hamlet near you...”. The smoked chili-honey syrup is sweet with a burn, like the playful menace of Bullseye in “I mean, Bullseye gonna be Bullseye… 🦷” and the heat in his political takes such as “TWEETING IS NOT ENOUGH”. Grapefruit juice adds a bitter-sunny balance for his mix of optimism and frustration about democracy, as seen in “I woke up this morning at 5:30, having dreamed of a country that will wake today & assert itself…”. The splash of soda water keeps it light and TV-ready—bubbly like his promo hype in “Do you like watching attractive people argue in suits? ME TOO!” while still grounded enough for the guy tweeting “Twitter is where I go to watch the social fabric unravel in real time.”

Your Hogwarts House
Wilson Bethel repeatedly throws himself into overt, real-world causes in a way that reads as brave and a bit heroic. He literally road-trips across the country to campaign for candidates, documenting a grind of door-knocking and phone banking while calling others to action: “DAY FIVE. Amarillo by morning... Dallas by sundown. I’ll be knocking on doors all week, getting out the vote for the mighty (and mightily inspiring) @BetoORourke...” and “If every tweet you saw today… were 1 door knocked on, 1 phone call made… imagine what our country might look like… TWEETING IS NOT ENOUGH”. He leans into confrontational political satire with a fearless, almost crusading edge, like his multi-part fantasy script skewering Trump that culminates in: “Barry: Sorry, Donny. You're fired.” and his sharp political commentary such as “Reminder: Never stare directly at the all consuming darkness that is @realDonaldTrump. #EclipseDay”. He also openly aligns with contentious causes, from campaigning for Beto O’Rourke and Stacey Abrams to putting “Free Palestine 🇵🇸” in his bio, and explicitly urging civic courage: “Assert yourself. Vote.”. The combination of public-facing activism, moral conviction, and a willingness to provoke in defense of his beliefs is quintessentially Gryffindor rather than the quieter diligence of Hufflepuff or the self-focused ambition of Slytherin.

Your movie

Your song
Katy Perry’s Roar fits Wilson Bethel because it blends humor, resilience, and outspoken activism—the same mix that runs through his timeline. He literally scripts a climactic moment with Obama and Trump underscored by Katy Perry in his Oval Office mini-screenplay, writing that the ominous whistling tune is “Katy Perry, 'Roar.'” (“The whistling is piercing now. Ominous, atonal. But the tune is unmistakable: Katy Perry, 'Roar.'”). His feed is full of political engagement and fighting spirit, from organizing volunteers for Beto O’Rourke (“This is a call to action, friends! KNOCK DOORS! MAKE CALLS! Democracy depends on YOU!”) to blunt reminders that “TWEETING IS NOT ENOUGH”. At the same time, he keeps it playful and self-deprecating with jokes about TV, toilet paper, and quarantine viewing (“The bad news: there was toilet paper. The bad news: It’s off brand.”), matching the song’s combination of empowerment and cheeky fun. His bio and activism signal a voice that wants to be heard—exactly the energy of a track about finding and using your roar.

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WilsonBethel
green: confident, yellow: guess, red: uncertain
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